67. Funding cuts and innovative solutions

2009 is upon us and, not unexpectedly, our funding has been cut. This has meant that the GR8 MATES program has had to cease while plans are put in place for the development of the program in the future.

Fortunately, GR8 MATES has received a one year grant from the Federal Government to pilot a new program with a strong career focus. The program will be school-based, but, instead of catering for the students who are beginning to disengage from school, it is open to any students aged 13 to 19 who want to follow one of the professions or trades identified as a skill shortage area in Australia (a list of these is provided). The program will only operate for about 14 weeks for each match and it will also involve group mentoring. I sense the mentors will be more like coaches than genuine mentors, one of my concerns about this type of program.

Overall the government wants 90 students mentored by at least 30 mentors.

The new GR8 MATES 4 Students program has been launched. There will be more of a career focus, as mentioned, and all mentors and students will be issued with the new Student's Manual. We hope to have a couple of mentors mentor a group of students while the other relationships will be 1:1 at this stage.

The email link could become a key component of this new program - time will tell.

The funding is nowhere near sufficient to cover the cost of setting up and running an effective youth mentoring program, but thanks to the fact that GR8 MATES is already established and being Program Coordinator is only part of my job, it is possible to run this new pilot.

We will also be aiming to recruit semi-retired and retired people with experience in a number of trades, as well as folk with experience in the health industry. Therein will be the challenge.

66. Some comments from parents about the mentoring journey

Receiving written feedback from parents has been a major challenge and we have not succeeded in this area at all. Parents were sent a 'Parent Exit Survey', which was relatively straightforward to complete. A stamped addressed envelope was included.

Some parents verbally commented on how much their child had benefitted from having a mentor.

Some of the mentees came from homes that were clearly not functioning too well. Although all mentees had to have written parents' permission to participate in the program, that was about as much as the parents were involved in the program.

“[My son] has benefited enormously. He has a more positive attitude to his schooling career and is generally more focused. He has chosen appropriate decisions when interacting with his peers. I think it’s a very valuable program and instills confidence, self-pride and power to achieve. EXCELLENT.”

“Has helped [my daughter] become work oriented, self-confident, self-motivated. The program has also given my daughter an independent view of the workplace.”

“Good, wise influence. The caring influence being added to [my son’s] growing up was priceless. Thanks for your efforts.”

“My daughter seems very confident and can control situations in her life a lot better.”

“[My son] was having some problems dealing with boys that were taunting/stirring him up. [His mentor] was able to provide an adult male perspective and help him through it. Many other things too. [My son] enjoyed the opportunity to discuss things confidentially with an adult male he trusted – would have liked it to go longer.”

65. What mentees thought about the mentoring journey

GR8 MATES mentees were aged 14 or 15 and embarked on the mentoring journey for between 6 and 9 months.

The main focus of the program was on increasing school retention, while exploring possible career pathways.

Mentees met with their mentors for one hour a week, at school, during the school term (semester).

Some of their comments follow:


“[My mentor] has helped me through good times and bad and has helped me cope. She has also helped me with what my goal is in life and things I need to do to achieve becoming a teacher…[the program] has heaps of different aspects and it is brilliant …it is perfect the way it is.”

“[My mentor] gave me a lot of confidence. He told me about my self-worth and my values. I was extremely lucky to get him as a mentor. I liked that I had someone to talk to whenever I needed to, through email and face to face. I realized throughout the journey my career goals and opportunities.”

“My mentor has helped me analyse myself and the careers I’m interested in and helped me to find better time managing skills. I liked having someone to talk to about life in general, and having someone who can relate to certain things has been helpful and fun.”

“She has really helped me with managing my time. She has also been a great help with finding information about my career and how to achieve it. I enjoyed the whole thing.”

“She has helped me find what I’d like to do when I’m older and set a goal, as well as helping me find work experience at good places J”

“Because I am 100% sure about where I’m going in life and have gained many valuable skills that will help me achieve my goals… gained a friend.”

“It was just good to be able to talk to someone about anything.”

“He has helped sort through my life and make right decisions when it comes to work related things. Very awesome person. Really been good with him.”

“[She] helped me gain self-confidence, realize what I wanted to do in the future, how I was going to get there and has helped me achieve my goals.”

“She told me things I just wanted to hear.”

“Helped find the jobs I like …talking about jobs…”

“I now understand what I want to do in life…I enjoyed it all.”

“She has opened my mind to the opportunities and still has more I’d love to learn from her. She took me to a Career Psychologist showing me what I am best at. She has helped open my mind J …it is a good program.”

“[She] has helped me become more confident in myself and I hope that I have made a positive impact on her life as well. I wish her all the best …talking about each other’s lives, resolving issues and having a good laugh. I liked everything. I think it was a great idea. Thank you for allowing me to have this experience.”

“Helped me with job opportunities eg, work experience.”

“She has helped me write my Resume. She organized work experience. Good rapport.”

“[She] has helped me with a lot of things…having someone to talk to.”

“He has been there if I needed to talk …make it last longer.”

“[She] has taught me to control my anger and shown me the importance of a good career.”

64. What mentors thought about the mentoring journey

I have spent the past few weeks evaluating our three GR8 MATES youth mentoring pilot programs and have been blown away by the results. The programs have surpassed all my expectations and, if the funding arrives, there are about 19 of the current mentors ready to mentor again in 2009.

The mentees were aged between 14 and 15, beginning to disengage from school in many respects.

The mentoring journey lasted between 6 and 9 months.

Volunteer mentors were aged 21 and over.


“[My mentee] began the program wanting to leave school at the end of the year and lacking in confidence. She now believes there are a lot of opportunities out there suited to her talents and is keen to go on to Year 12.”

“We discussed training options for going in to child care and, based on what I knew about her, was able to direct her into a way that would get her to achieve her goal. I enjoyed the program overall.”

“We widened the range of possibilities for future studies and careers. Initially he was only looking at Paramedics, but is also now looking at Business Studies as an alternative. I think the program is a wonderful initiative and would be happy to write testimony or speak about it to other possible mentors.”

“Helped keep him moving forward …support from staff was excellent and [I enjoyed] the freedom within the program scope to find the path that best suited mentee.”

“I do believe I have helped him become a bit more focused on what and where he wants to go with his life.”

“Perhaps the ground work was put down for future mentoring.”

“I believe that [my mentee] has developed during the time we have been spending together. I believe that the formal part of the program was a bit short – although I understand that the intention is to extend it which will be great. The program is very well put together. Robin is an excellent facilitator and his passion for young people is inspirational.”

“I noticed a general change in attitude over the time. [My mentee] became more positive overall. Coordinator and support/training was fantastic.”

“Able to introduce [her] to someone whose support enabled her to identify her strengths and weaknesses and career preferences. The fact that she will return to the school in 2009 is a plus, as she had earlier planned to move schools.”

“His attitude has changed and is happier with himself and has made new friends.”

“I think [he] has become more positive, more engaged at school. I really enjoyed him starting to open up to me. He doesn’t talk much to his family, so it was very rewarding.”

“Hopefully I have given [him] ideas, challenges, options, to think about his future. The school has been great, so has Robin. Great job. Great program. We could do with more funding to make sure this is always available for more kids, more schools and is around long into the future. More people like Robin.”

“Introduced some hard realities of leaving school Yr10 vYR12; took practical step in taking [him] to work place; relaxed approach, taking day to day issues as they come; reflected on links to family, both work and relationships.”

“Helped [him] focus on priorities and actions taking you closer or away from your goals. Better time management awareness. Some public speaking tips. A wonderful experience. I really enjoyed it and got a lot from it.”

“I enjoyed the training, meeting other mentors from varied areas of the community, the matching process and getting to know my mentee. I introduced the idea of Graphic Art to [him]. An area that he is very interested in and didn’t know was available as a career path.”

“I believe I encouraged [her] to see herself in a more positive light, which is good. However, I did not manage to encourage her enough so that she plans on staying longer at school.”

“She is having more emotional days than in the beginning, which I see as her identifying her thoughts and how and why to deal with them. Her marks and organization have improved. [I enjoyed] watching the growth of a young community member; learning how to deal with varying emotions …occasionally her emotional rollercoaster rides concerned me – that I was losing my way with her – BUT Robin always set me on the right way again.”

“I feel that I have made a small difference in her life. She is a very shy girl who maybe didn’t have a lot of confidence in herself. She is slowly gaining confidence and starting to believe in herself. I enjoyed seeing her grow over the last few months even though it was small changes… The support that is given during the process such as comments about how Robin could see a change in her.”

“Through the many activities and discussions we have shared, I have seen a development in his confidence, resilience, self-esteem and self-assurance. He is developing a strength to manage his behavior, his time, his skills and abilities. He is beginning to vision, dream and realize his brilliant potential! Has been a privilege to be a small part of this. “An outstanding program – with amazing potential for many young people – and mentors too. Needs to be expanded, encouraged and funded/supported by powers that be!”

“We worked through career/goal setting/thinking about people, life and jobs and did role plays and discussed experiences (real and possibilities).”

“His manner came across more confident and positive. He has become very open in conversation with me. Watching him go from so lazy and unmotivated to keen to get an apprenticeship and also seeing him looking forward to us meeting each week.”

“I saw him grow in confidence and self-belief. All the “I don’t know” and “it depends” answers diminished in frequency. There was also a change in his physical appearance – no longer hid behind long hair and he carried himself more confidently. He was always keen to meet together. At times when the going got a bit tough there was always good advice and encouragement. Feedback on how we were making progress was great… discovering career paths – his excitement and motivation when he realized what he wanted to do.”

63. Passing the baton - the power of mentoring

I had the most amazing moment during the closure of one program last week.

One of the students approached me and asked if the mentees could mentor the new students at the school next year. Well, of course it was not my decision, but I encouraged her to explore this possibility and have subsequently told the School Coordinator about the conversation.

The power of mentoring continues to surprise me. Here, too, was a student who barely could speak to me six months ago, coming along to have this chat and then, as we were packing up, coming to thank me for allowing her to participate in the program.

The school needs young leaders or people of positive influence. What a thought if students who had participated in GR8 MATES could move on to become peer mentors.

I will be spending the next couple of weeks collating all the information I have gathered from these programs, putting together a report for my Board. I already know that the three pilots have been successful - way exceeded my expectations ...... maybe more later.

62. More WOW! Moments as third program closes

Today will long remain as one of the most memorable days I have had being involved in a youth mentoring program. Sam (not her real name) came back! Sam had basically dropped out of school about seven weeks ago and had moved in with her boyfriend, who was a few years older than her, partly because she was having difficult family issues. Her mentor and I were trying to work out strategies to reach her, but were experiencing problems in this regard.

Last week I was told Sam had returned to school to write her exams. Today Sam appeared for the Celebration event and looked positively radiant! Each of the mentors and students shared something about the GR8 MATES program they had enjoyed.

Sam told us that she had thought she would not be allowed back to school. However, she had approached the acting Principal and had a discussion with him. Sam had decided that she not only wanted to return to school to write her Public Exams next week, but she wanted to stay on and complete her schooling! Her mentor shed a few tears and I think everyone in the room was moved, as Sam has had a tough time.

I spoke to Sam after the function and let her know how proud of her I was, told her that she had made some courageous decisions in recent weeks and also assured her that never again would she have to feel alone. One of her issues was that she didn't feel she had anyone to talk to, but now she realises how important her mentor is in her life and they have agreed to carry on meeting. In addition, I have also offered to be a support to her via email. Sam has moved back home as well and knows she has to work at her relationship with her mum.

There were other great stories of how students had grown through the program and once again I needed little convincing that youth mentoring is highly effective, even though this program was only for six months, probably three months too short.

Some students absolutely did not want to speak publicly, but all gave it a go and some fears about public speaking were destroyed.

Another fantastic highlight for me was when a couple of students approached me and asked if it would be okay for them to mentor new students next year! Clearly this is not my decision, but I gave them every encouragement. How fantastic it was to know that these young lives had been impacted by their mentors in significant ways and now they want to pass on what they have learnt to others. Sam said she would say to any student: "Stay at school! Stay at school! Stay at school!"

What a privilege it has been to be a part of these young lives :-)

61. Fantastic WOW! Moments at Celebration event

The second of our three GR8 MATES programs finished last week and we enjoyed a great celebration of the mentoring journey. 10 or 11 of the mentors have now committed to mentoring another student next year. One mentor is moving from the area, otherwise would be involved and the other lectures in a Tertiary College, so might not be able to participate due to timetable clashes. Many mentors will stay in touch with their students.

Students shared anything they wished about the journey and the mentors did likewise. The following two testaments to mentors highlight the power of youth mentoring and this after only six months, which I still think is too short.

GR8 MATES Year 10 student’s address to the gathering of mentors and mentees at the celebratory event to mark the end of the program (names have been changed to protect privacy).

Dear Anne

Thank you for all the help and support you have given me over the months we have been together.

You have made me realise that nothing is impossible and I can do anything I aspire to be.

You’ve made me stronger both physically and mentally. Before I met you my anger got the best of me. Now, through your support, anger and depression no longer are part of me.

Now I believe I’m making something of my life and to better my future. You have shown me the importance of a good career and the benefits of a healthy lifestyle.

I could never thank you enough. You are truly the most caring person I’ve ever met and I wish to thank you for your commitment to me. You’ve made me a better person and for that I will never forget you.

Thank you.

James

Year 10 student’s note to her mentor at the conclusion of a GR8 MATES pilot program (names changed to protect identity):

To Jo

I write this letter to thank you Jo because without you I doubt I would have gotton through the year. You’ve been a mentor and a friend, which is more than I could of expected and I also thank you for your patience and guidance and I’m glad to have a mentor who cares as much as you care.

Whether I fail school or not, I also want to give you my deepest gratitude for all your help. It was your time to do with what you wish. Instead you came to my school every [week] and offered me advice and friendship!

Kath

Our third pilot concludes this week and I wonder what will occur at that celebratory event :-)

60. Winding down two programs and learning lessons

There are an interesting couple of weeks ahead, as two pilot programs come to an end.

Most of the students have now completed their online Student Performer and it is clear that in the majority of mentoring relationships the students have made some significant progress. Almost all of them have a much greater understanding of career pathways and the options open to them, which is one of the major features of the GR8 MATES program. As this has happened, so has their attitude to school and academic studies improved and, in the majority of cases, there also appears to be a growth in self-image, self-confidence and a greater willingness to reveal the 'real me'. I am sure there is a whole lot more and will make an effort to comment more fully on a future blog.

A couple of months ago I decided to write one combined email to the mentors of our three programs each week. Previously I had been writing a separate one to each group. The idea behind the combined one, in addition to the obvious saving of administrative time, was to be an encouragement and reassurance to the mentors, perhaps an opportunity to learn from the efforts of other programs etc. Well, in chatting to a mentor the other day, I came to realise that this was not a good idea, as mentors are busy people and don't read the emails from beginning to end, even when I highlight key points. So, it's clear that a short, sharp email to each group separately is a more effective strategy to ensure effective ongoing training and support.

I have also added a School Cordinator's Program Exit Survey in addition to those for mentors, mentees and parents. I can't believe that I overlooked this earlier :-)

What has been great to see is that thus far 12 of the current group of 19 mentors have indicated they would like to be matched with another student next year. I was not expecting over 50% to volunteer again. Being totally honest, I thought I might be lucky to scrape 25%, but, reading their Exit Surveys, I can see how much they have enjoyed the journey and have valued the level of support they have received from program staff and the School Coordinator - there's a lesson there! A couple also intimated that they feel they have learnt so much, they reckon they could be more effective the next time around.

Tomorrow is the first Celebration of the ending of one of these pilot programs - promises to be an interesting day.

59. Is 6 months too short for a mentoring relationship - some discoveries

Yesterday some of the students from one of our pilot programs completed their online Student Performer. They had completed this task at the beginning of the mentoring journey and now, six months later, they have completed the exact same task.

I have yet to do a full analysis, but what is revealed is the following:

• when mentors have attended training, are aware of what is required of them and consistently turn up, week in and week out at school for a six month period, they can achieve a huge amount.
• where the focus has been on encouraging these students to think about their careers and different career pathways, the program has been a resounding success.
• far more was achieved in six months than I could ever have hoped for. However, had we been able to start the program at the beginning of this year, which we were unable to do for a number of reasons, I believe these students would have made even more progress and would be in an even better space.
• this Student Performer tool from Frontline Solutions has proven to be a fantastic program evaluation tool.

On Wednesday I was about to announce that training would go ahead for the next program, which I wrote about in my previous Blog, when suddenly four potential mentors withdrew, two because of changing work and study situations and a couple unable to commit into 2009 at this stage. So, I have had to cancel the training, but seven of our current mentors have expressed an interest in continuing with another student next year.

This is fantastic news and I have suggested to the school that we go ahead, but with a smaller group, just to keep the momentum going while we await our funding future.

During the next two weeks, we will complete our two pilot programs, with all students and mentors completing the profilers - promises to be an interesting time.

58. Potential dangers of a government funded program

I have written before that GR8 MATES is linked to a federal funded not-for-profit organisation. In one month our two other pilot programs will be completed.

I am also experiencing the perennial difficulty of recruiting volunteers for another program, mainly because the mentoring program is only part of my job and also because I haven't really had enough time to recruit these volunteers. The school at which we are completing a pilot wants us to run another program next year. So, the idea is to train the mentors before the end of the year, match them and then they will be ready to begin the journey in February 2009.

Thus far three of the current crop of mentors have indicated that they would like to continue next year and I have about six or eight others interested, though none of these have completed Application Forms yet. I will do some phoning on Monday and Tuesday next week, but if I don't have 10 - 15 mentors for the program, I won't go ahead at the moment.

What this could mean, though, is that we will not be able to launch another program until we know whether or not we will be receiving more funding beyond 2009. Our Federal Government has changed, the economy is being hit by the world global recession - is one allowed to use that word? - so the government might decide our programs should be cut. It would be shooting itself in the foot, as we are working at skilling Australia, which is one of their election platforms. However, with all that they know about youth mentoring at the moment, we are justified to feel worried.

Had we been able to access the status that allows us to seek funders from the corporate world and philanthropists etc., which has a special tax break for the donors, we might already be in a position to be self-sustaining. However, as I have mentioned in previous Blogs, it's like climbing Mount Everest.

The next two weeks will be interesting.

Schools open again on Monday and our three programs get under way :-)

57. Nearing the end - a new beginning!

Well, two programs are almost completed. It's school holidays now. Once term resumes, the two other pilot programs will have three weeks to run. I am still feeling that we could have had another three months with these pilots for them to be more effective, so it will be interesting to see what the results of the end of program online Mentor Profiler and Student Performers are.

I have just completed an analysis of the first pilot's Mentor Profilers and Student Profilers. Both show significant growth in the students' development, while the mentors, as a group, have also shown more signs of positive development than I was expecting. I am awaiting some more feedback to my analysis from the founders of the program. Once I have this, perhaps I will place a summary as a separate blog page.

It is looking like we have lost one student from one of the pilots. She has not been at school for many weeks and thus could be regarded as a student who has disengaged. Not even being a part of the mentoring program persuaded her to stay at school. Sadly, negative peer pressure, self-esteem issues and other personal issues have won the day, let's hope only temporarily, as she has so much more potential than even she seems to realize. She had such a fantastic mentor who was prepared to walk the extra mile for her, but to no avail. Had we started the program in February instead of May perhaps she might still be at school and participating positively in the program - we will never know.

However, there have been more positives in some of the relationships. Mentors accompanied their mentees to the Apprenticeship Expo last week or else had assisted their mentees with Resume writing (CV), so they could deliver these to any potential employers. I suppose a slightly negative point was that some of the youngsters who should have gone to the Expo did not do so. There will be excuses made, but ultimately this lack of energy or determination (possibly self-belief?) to get there would be reasons why they are involved in the GR8 MATES program.

It's also good to hear how mentors are arranging work experience opportunities for their mentees and how they have assisted their mentees with their subject selection for 2009, often because they had been exploring possible careers together.

The second program at the school where we had our first pilot is going so well. There are a couple of disciplinary issues or absences that have slowed down the progress of a couple of relationships, but these mentoring relationships have plenty of time to get going next term. I am thinking that most of the mentors and their students have already got a pretty good connection, a couple have fantastic connections so early in the program, suggesting that those students were totally ready for the mentoring journey. It was good to hear that one student invited his mentor to watch him playing in a school activity, while another mentor has been watching his student playing Soccer matches during weekends. The latter student brought a whole lot of his Soccer medals to school the week before last and was wonderfully affirmed by program staff and his mentor and, I suspect, some of his peers quietly admired his achievements.

Still working on recruiting for the first 2009 program. I am putting together a Power Point presentation for a group of +100 Rotarians next week, desperately hoping that 10% might show an interest in the new program :-)

56. The Mentor as a wise guide

During this past week I have seen some wonderful examples of the key role of a mentor as a wise guide, some of which I will share in this Blog, simply to give ideas for other mentors who might be battling with their mentees at times.

A number of mentors have been spending time helping their mentees put together their Resumes or C.Vs. This Tuesday night our organisation runs its annual Apprenticeship and Traineeship Expo in Penrith. It is a huge occasion and we are expecting about 3,000 students and their parents to pass through the Expo. There are probably over 80 Apprenticeships and Traineeships on offer for students wanting to move into that area of work. Some will be able to get school-based Apprenticeships and Traineeships, while others will be able to obtain full-time Apprenticeships and Traineeships allowing them to leave school at the end of the year.

Mentors are volunteers. How good it is to hear that some mentors are volunteering their time to accompany their mentees to the Expo. In a couple of cases, where there is a single parent, the mentor has offered to accompany their mentee and the parent to the Expo.

There have been some great emails going back and forth between some mentors and their mentees. I think of one email from the mentee to her mentor, simply saying how much she is looking forward to each session.

Then there was another one full of emotion and all sorts of things being shared. The mentor responded with great wisdom, simply encouraging the mentee to believe in herself as much as she (the mentor) did. Together they will work on strategies in the weeks ahead.

There are still a couple of students who are away from school far too much and this has meant that the mentors have been unable to become involved as much as they might have. I suspect they have felt frustrated, but that's the nature of the school-based mentoring relationship. While it would be easy to arrange for mentors and mentees to share phone numbers in such a program, I am still undecided as to whether or not this is a wise idea and don't seem to have found any other school-based programs that allow this. It would be good to find out if there are any.

55. Positive signs and more planning

This has been a productive week. One group of mentees completed their Student Online Performer and this has immediately given mentors ideas as to the areas they can explore with their mentees. Many of the students are revealing a great deal of potential, yet their self-belief and self-image will need attention. This is nothing new for a teenager. The fact that they are a little low on self-esteem is one of the reasons they are in the program. What I enjoyed, though, was the positive vibe in the room while the students were completing these Student Performers in the company of their mentors.

A couple of students and their mentors have also embarked on the use of the email facility, which is also fantastic to see. One student has shared all sorts of 'stuff' already and has given the mentor a chance to start encouraging her, building her self-confidence and talking about different things they can do. Another student, only three weeks into the relationship, sent an email to his mentor informing the latter that he was sick and would not be at school for the mentoring session - very positive signs early in this new program. I would love to see more mentors and their students using the email facility like this.

In another program one of the students was chatting to me about some of the things she has been doing with her mentor, mostly exploring career options, work experiences etc. The student commented that GR8 MATES had got her thinking about stuff she would never have thought about. Instead of leaving school at the end of this year, which had been her original plan, she is staying on for a further two years and has all sorts of plans, whilst being more motivated as well.

One school, where the program finishes in late October, has asked if they can run another program next year. However, we will attempt to recruit and train the mentors before the end of the year, match them with the students before the year closes, so they can begin the mentoring journey as soon as schools open in 2009. Pressure now on to recruit the mentors, a major task for the week ahead :-)

54. How am I doing as a mentor?

The above question has been asked or implied in discussions with some of our mentors in recent weeks. In my weekly email out to all our mentors last week, I wrote:

In recent weeks, I sense that there is one question many mentors are asking themselves, which is quite normal: How am I doing? Sometimes it can be asked another way: Do you think I am making any difference?

Back we go to the training! A reminder that every young person is in a different space and that there is no competition in this mentoring journey. I have watched mentors listen to their mentees telling them that they are adamant they will be leaving school at the end of Year 10. A few weeks later the mentee is equally adamant that he or she is remaining at school until Year 12. A few weeks later the same young person is talking of leaving again at the end of Year 10. Welcome to the world of the teenager!!

Then there is the mentee who wants to become a hairdresser or a mechanic. Off they go to work experience and discover this is not for them. That’s brilliant, as that’s what the work experience is all about. Then it’s back to the drawing board with the mentor to look at other interests etc. and the journey of career exploration begins all over again.

This is what mentoring is all about and it cannot be measured. What is going on is the presence of a wise guide in the life of a young person trying to find his or her way – there is communication, social skill development and so much more occurring.

Then there will be other mentoring relationships where mentors are concerned about possible drug use, too much wagging school (truancy), a mentee with totally different values etc. etc. No mentor will be able to change behavior patterns in a week or two or three. In fact, no mentor will be able to change behavior patterns at all. What the mentor can do is be that non-judgmental, empathetic cheerleader and let the mentee take responsibility for his or her decisions, no matter how painful that might be for the mentor. That is the reality of life and sometimes these young people have to go to the bottom of the pit until they discover they can make different choices. It’s tough, it’s hard and some of them are so caught up in negative behavior patterns they just can’t see a way out. So, we need to sow the resiliency seeds by identifying and naming resilient qualities and encourage them to create a network of support around themselves. Are all mentors doing this?

Every mentor who turns up week in and week out is making a difference in that young person’s life. Have no fear of that! That’s why I believe so passionately in mentoring these young people. 10 years from now something you might have shared with your mentee might suddenly kick in. Had you not been there for the young person, that WOW! moment might never have happened, so that’s something to always keep at the back of your mind.

Planning is under way for 2009. It looks like one of the schools running a pilot program wants another program next year, with the mentors being trained soon so they are able to start at the beginning of next year. More of that another time........

53. The joys and pains of adolescence

An interesting couple of weeks.

Our new program is up and running and most of the matches seem to have taken off incredibly quickly and well. The beauty of being involved in youth mentoring programs is their unpredictability! I have had a few splutters trying to get the Student Online Performer completed, but I hope to have that done next week. I would prefer it completed before the mentoring relationship is too far down the road, as that gives a better idea of where the students are at when they begin the journey.

There have been some wonderful developments. One student, who was ready to leave school a few months ago, is now absolutely convinced that she needs to complete her final two years of schooling and seems pretty motivated to do so. Her mentor arranged for her to meet another mentor who works at a local tertiary education institution. This visit was a great success and the student commented that she did not know how many options there were for her until that day. Another heads off with her student to visit a small business in the area tomorrow. Yet another took his mentee to visit a few small businesses a couple of weeks ago. The student is now more motivated to move forward with his career planning and is going to ask one of the people he visited if he can have a week of work experience there.

On the flipside of the coin is the reality that students are still adolescents, have all the mood swings etc. etc. One student has spent far too much time away from school. This has hampered the mentoring relationship. The mentor helped arrange a work experience for the student. The student attended two of the four days and that about sums up where this youngster is at. Perhaps, though, the student realised that she was not cut out for that particular profession.

Mentors continually need to be reminded that the students are adolescents and their behaviour patterns are unlikely to change after one 'chat' with their mentor. I will send out a reminder about this when I email all the mentors tomorrow. I fear some mentors beat themselves up because they don't feel they are achieving enough fast enough, or they expect their mentee to change behaviour patterns, forgetting the huge peer pressure and so on. Over and over again I see my role as reminding the mentors that they are seed sowers - patience, patience, patience!

Over and above all this, I am becoming increasingly concerned at the lack of role modelling in far too many families. Parenting skills are woefully lacking ............ then, again, that's also a generalisation.

52. Mentors and the danger of high expectations

In recent weeks I have had a number of discussions with mentors who have expressed disappointment that their mentees might not have completed a relatively easy task they agreed to see completed when last they met.

During the training I suggest to mentors that they have no expectations of their mentees. Then they will not be disappointed! Most of these students are lacking self-confidence and genuinely believe that they can't achieve much with their lives. This is because of the messages they might have been receiving from parents, peers and teachers. Perhaps it is because they might have a sibling who appears to do well at school, in sport or in some other area and they spend time comparing themselves to this sibling. There are many reasons for these situations, the most common one that I have come across being a mentee living in an unstable, insecure environment.

Anyway, it's been a good time to remind mentors not to have these unreal expectations and rather to use their mentoring sessions to do all the things they and their mentees want to do. While they might not achieve as much in the time available, they might decide to continue meeting one another at the end of the formal program and thus they have some strong foundations on which to build the next leg of their journey. If they quietly persevere, there is a very good chance the young person's self-esteem will be on the rise and then anything becomes possible.

Mentors continue to underestimate the positive effect their weekly appearances for these mentoring sessiomns have on their mentees ie, a volunteer adult consistently turning up week after week to encourage them to reach their potential.

A couple of mentors have organised visits to local businesses or a local tertiary training institution during the past couple of weeks and they are already beginning to see the positives from these excursions.

The beauty of mentoring is that it is so unpredictable!

51. New matching, interesting progress

A busy week last week. On Tuesday the new group of mentors attended the matching session with the new group of students. There is a lot of flu going around at the moment, so it was not really a surprise that a couple of students were away from school. Then one of the students arrived with a friend. The friend wanted to participate, but did not really know much about the program. Unfortunately the School Coordinator was away at another function, so I had some quick decision-making to do. Another girl had arrived as well and insisted that she was supposed to be there. Her name was not on the list! A mentor from the previous program at the school, who also taught part-time there, came to my rescue. She looked for students who had not arrived. A couple of students said they no longer wanted to participate in the program - they have no idea of the opportunity they will be missing, but we don't want students to participate if they are not keen to do so. Eventually we got under way and I allowed the new students to stay. It was good having two mentors from the previous program participating in this program.

We had plenty of laughter and fun even though I had to condense the program because of the late start. Both mentors and students made their confidential choices at the end and I am processing these at the moment. I am still waiting for the school to inform me as to which students who were away that day will remain in the program. With the matching due to take place on Tuesday, I have little time to get things organised. Hopefully, things will come together.

What have I learnt?

Probably the key points which I will take into future matchings will involve having more students present than mentors and all the paperwork from the students completed and handed in to the School Coordinator. This latter point has been an ongoing issue in all our programs and one we do need to get on top of. Also, it's crucial that the School Coordinator is present.

The two other programs had many highs! Mentors are beginning to arrange visits to local businesses and to the local tertiary institutions their mentees are interested in attending. Another mentor is assisting her mentee, who is working through some difficult issues at the moment, to find work experience for a week, just testing the water with regard to future career possibilities. Another mentee told me that she is now going to stay at school next year. A couple of months ago she was adamant that she was going to leave.

These are a few of the positives from the week gone by. There are more. As the connection between mentor and mentee is firmed up, so there is movement in the type of activities the mentors are beginning to get involved in with their mentees.

50. 'GR8 MATES ROX!'

Thus wrote a student participating in the GR8 MATES program when the first surveys of our second and third programs were carried out earlier this week. How positive is that!

While there have been a few wobbles as a result of transient students, the programs are settling down and becoming very positive in all respects. Last week the mentors from one of the programs accompanied their mentees to a local Nepean Careers Market where they had the opportunity to visit a variety of stalls covering many possible careers, places of further study, Apprenticeship opportunities and so on. Approximately 6,600 students pass through this event over two days and it is easy for students to waste the time or to feel overwhelmed. Another mentor has assisted a student with the development of a career plan, offering extra time to take the student to a friend of hers who works in this field. On Wednesday night another mentor accompanied her mentee to the student's 2009 subject selection evening at the school and, judging from the emails that have been exchanged since then, this has further cemented the mentoring relationship. Another mentor is planning to introduce her menteee to a high profile sporting organisation towards the end of August if the mentee meets all his school commitments and so I could go on.

12 mentors are preparing for a matching session with students at the local High School where we concluded our first mentoring program recently. This promises to be an interesting occasion.

I shared some points with our mentors earlier today:

· Get out and about. Go for a walk and talk, rather than just settle in a chair and don’t move ie. bring variation into the mentoring meetings. If you move around a bit, this gets the oxygen flowing to the brain and the focus of the student will be consistently good!
· Use the computers for researching, checking emails etc.
· If you are sitting at a table, sit next to one another rather than across from one another. This leads to better communication, you can observe body language etc.
· Preferably sit some way apart from another mentoring pair so you can chat without being overheard.

Small things are being achieved as the program gets under way in these schools. The program only has another 10 weeks to run and it will be interesting to compare the evaluations at the end of the two current programs with those of the first program that took place over 10 months.

49. Celebration of Learning! What a lot of WOW moments!

Earlier this week the formal part of the first GR8 MATES pilot program came to an end with a Celebration of Learning at the school. A few parents attended, though we did not expect many, as it was held during the middle of a working day. Students and mentors received Certificates for participating in the program and both mentor and mentee shared something about their mentoring journey during the past nine months.

The presentations took a variety of forms. One mentor interviewed his mentee. Three mentees delivered brief Power Point presentations and some simply shared their moments in brief speeches. The power of effective mentoring was the message that shone through each and every presentation. One mentee shared how he was in a really bad space this time last year before joining the program. As a result of the time shared with his mentor, he is now motivated, focused, self-confident and has a definite career path which will include a university degree. He shared how difficult it was to share all his antisocial behaviour issues that were getting him into trouble, but his mentor had pointed out to him that, 'Failure is not a person!' They had processed everything and moved on.

Another mentee shared how her mentor had helped her shape a career path, had assisted her find work experience and had been such a strong support to her, a theme that was echoed by a number of the mentees. Another mentor shared what a privilege it was for her to be allowed to enter her mentee'slife and publicly thanked him for the opportunity to share. A mentee pointed out how much he had enjoyed the time with his mentor, chatting aboutthings he would not have talked to his parents about ....... and so it went on.

Jayden was a young person very unsure of himself when he joined the program. Nine months later he delivered a superb Power Point show of his jouney with his mentor, Margaret. He has given permission for extracts to be used, so here they are straight from his slides:


• When we were getting to know each other, (when we first met) we decided to look at what we had in common, which wasn’t a lot but we did have at least one thing in common and that was that we were both eager to work through this together and complete the tasks we set before us successfully.
• During the journey I changed my mind many times, I changed my mind about what kind of work I want to do, I changed my mind about how I want to live, I changed my mind about going to TAFE [ a tertiary institute] and I hope that all these changes will be for the best.
• I now know, I want to become a vet instead of a scientist, I want to spend less time wasting my time and using the time to help get me through life as a vet.
• I also know now that I don’t want to go to TAFE and with that spare time I will do voluntary work.
• From this mentoring journey I learnt a lot of things, things such as, What I wanted to do for my future career and how I was going to achieve the goals I set for myself. The mentoring journey has also showed me how I could improve my life so I wasted a lot less time on things that didn’t matter and I decided to use that time to help myself achieve my long term goals and I don’t think I could have achieved this without the help of my mentor and this mentoring program.

Jayden’s mentor, Margaret, publicly responded to his presentation and concluded with these words:

• I have enjoyed sharing this journey with Jayden. I have seen him grow in confidence and self-belief. He has made positive changes in his daily life, has discovered a career path that interests him and has become more assertive. I have enjoyed his sense of humour. I wish him well for his future and know that if he continues to believe in himself he will accomplish more than he ever dreamed of.

Marion also allowed me to share a poem she wrote for her mentor which she read out to everyone, another powerful testimony about the power of a mentoring relationship. This poem can be found on the website: http://www.yess.co.nz/ in the 'Mentor' section under the heading, 'Tribute to a Mentor from a Mentee.' Free to download for anyone wishing to share with a group of mentors in training or simply needing some encouragement.

And so I could go on - a memorable day which ended with a large feast enjoyed by one and all.

Letters were sent out to all mentors, mentees and the mentees' parents informing them that the formal part of the program has ended. A number of mentors will continue to meet regularly with their mentees until the end of the year and most appear keen to stay in touch.

I still need to collate all the Exit Surveys and other material completed at the end of the journey and will post some conclusions at a later date.

That same night the training ended for the next group of mentors beginning a new program at the same school. They are keen, motivated and anxious at the same time. We have to conclude the post-training mentor interviews when I return from two weeks leave :-) and then it's all go!!

48. First Program early evaluation results

The first pilot project of the GR8 MATES program comes to an end next week. This past week has been a time for reflection, completing Mentor Exit Surveys, Mentee Exit Surveys and the online Mentor Profiler and Student Performer. Although it's too early to make any conclusive statements, it is not too early to say that this first program has been a resounding success. Students who have completed the Student Performer online have shown growth in many areas. Early signs are showing that those students who have grown in self-confidence are beginning to make strides to reach their potential. As there has been more of a leaning towards school retention and the development of career pathways in this program, it is good to see how much more confident most students appear to be in these areas. I need to do a lot more work on the evaluations etc., but there is enough evidence to suggest that a school-based youth mentoring program like GR8 MATES can be life-changing for young people who have plenty of self-doubt and, perhaps, are beginning to disengage from school.

I am looking forward to seeing how the mentors have fared in the Mentor Profiler and hope that most of them will complete this during the forthcoming weekend.

The two other programs are becoming more settled. In one of the schools another mentee has left the school, so we are awaiting the paperwork from another student. Mentors involved in these processes are showing great patience and restraint, as it would be all too easy for them to walk away from the program. I keep all mentors informed of developments in the three programs via a weekly email note and the feedback about these tends to be positive. It's a small way of continually reminding them that they are valued.

On Tuesday night the next batch of mentors will complete their training. School holidays follows and then the matching process will begin in early August. I have had confirmation from the outgoing group of mentors that almost all want to continue in the program, if not in August then when we run another program in 2009.